Monday 8 December 2014

Winter Wondering

Black Forest beech tree



It is that time in the Black Forest when the sky is dull, heavy and grey, and the cool dampness in the air makes you want to sit for hours in front of a warm fire place.
Winter is here, dark is more prominent then light, time seems to have slowed, as well as the earth.





…..It is a time of waiting





















...yet of expectation. 





Something IS to come.


ADVENT- coming, arrival








I wonder if the earth felt that kind of anticipation two thousand years ago. Did it sense an advent was upon it? That something was coming? That a Savior was to be born?

He didn’t come with the clash of loud cymbals. He arrived in a way which most people would never have noticed: poor, a refugee, a child. 

He came in the most vulnerable of ways.

"Do you see what I  see? "



If we don’t slow down…we will miss It.  


Miss what most don’t see,

Miss the message, 

Miss the small but beautiful, 

Miss what is the biggest, the paradox.


 Miss what we can’t afford to miss: LIFE. 

 Schauinsland, Schwarzwald, Germany

 "He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. Yet to those who received him, he gave the right to become children of God." 
John 1:10-12


"Wandering" in Schauinsland with good friends

Wednesday 19 November 2014

Not your Typical Thanksgiving List





Here in Germany the temperatures are slowly dropping, the wind in blowing,  the fall-colored leaves are falling and there is that moist dampness with a hint of fermented apple smell in the air that reminds us that winter is fast approaching.

Enjoying a walk in the Black Forest with Sigrid a good friend visiting from Austria

As I sit here in the quiet of my cozy home in the still dark morning hours before the house awakens to a new busy day, my thoughts turn to the theme of thanksgiving and the preparations for next week. 

Menu planning, who will cook what, which table decorations… Will dad be out of the hospital and able to come? The absence of our college kids, … how we will miss having them here. What “thanksgiving thought” will we share?

I begin to think back over this past year and the many life changes that will be represented in the group that will be gathered here on thanksgiving day; many exciting changes, some hard, some scary, and yes, some very challenging.

It is easy for me to thank for all the good things, and there have been so many of those this year. 


Got to join Phil in South Africa last week for his OSWW staff retreat


But what about all those things that were not so easy… plans that turned out differently from what I had hoped for, those unanswered questions, unending challenges, mountains that seem insurmountable, battles of my mind, disappointments, and perhaps the letting go of dreams…what about those?  Do I give thanks for those?



I read a quote by Spurgeon this morning that really spoke to me:

“ There is no greater mercy that I know on earth than good health, except it be sickness; and that has often been a greater mercy to me than health…. It is a good thing to be without a trouble, but it is a better thing to have a trouble and know how to get grace enough to bear it.”

Rough waters on cap Agulhas ( the southern most tip of Africa)


I breathe a sigh of relief… yes, that is it.  That is what I am truly thankful for… the knowing that there is someone who provides “grace enough to bear it” … and not just for me, but for my family, friends, the children I think of because of our work in Africa, whom I carry in my heart.

So I pick up my pen and continue writing my “list of thanksgiving” for the things present in my life that are not your typical thanksgiving items, but are items for which I know God has given me, given you, given them ... grace enough to bear.

 
Phil's OSWW team confronting the  massive challenge of Africa's marginalized children
Dad recovering after his heart surgery

Sunday 2 November 2014

Walls & Gates

Funny, when Phil is away (he is in South Africa right now) and I am alone at home, I find myself double locking  the downstairs door and making sure no windows are open at night.  I am usually not a fearful person, but somehow I feel more vulnerable when he is away.  This vulnerability makes me aware of the potential  “points of entrance” that if someone wanted to break in, they would most likely use.

A couple of days ago I read a verse in the Bible that stood out to me:

 “ No longer will violence be heard in your land, nor ruin or destruction within your borders, but you will call your walls salvation and your gates praise.” Isaiah 60: 18



It could be that having just come back from the Congo, a country that was misused, mislead and abused by outsiders and insiders alike, that I was reminded of how fragile our world is.
Seeing the reconstruction that is needed there makes me aware that not only in places like the Congo but everywhere: our societies, families, marriages and personal lives that we are susceptible and vulnerable to elements that may lead to destruction and undoing. 




The verse I read made me think of 2 things: that I am thankful for the walls of salvation in my life, which represent to me the safety and security I have through my faith in God, but I did have questions about the gates.

Gates historically have been related to access, trade, safety, defense and health. It was the place where important announcements; agreements and transactions were made. They were typically guarded and protected by the military.





My questions came because of the negative I have felt come out of a defensive, dogmatic, fearful "us vs. them perspective", which has caused much damage. On the other hand  the verse reminded me that yes, we do need gates and even walls in our lives, but instead of seeing them as restrictive and imprisoning, we may see them as safe, life giving and freeing.  Gates that know when to open and close.




Walls of salvation” boy,…  the world needs protection that brings life!! When you hear about the horrors of rape, sexual and physical abuse used as a military weapon on women in the Congo,  the world needs walls of salvation.  Places with life giving, nurturing walls where women in the Congo can grow, blossom and be all that they are meant to be.  This is something I think of when I think of the school we are planning.



What about “gates of praise?

While in Congo our Teachbeyond team was looking at properties to rent for the school we are helping to open next September.  One of the locations we looked at was in a rundown, dirty and overcrowded area of Kinshasa.  As we were walking through this uncomfortable area clutching tightly our personal possessions, we heard some singing…somepraises, praises to God coming from a church situated at the center of this area (watch my video clip bellow).





The contrast was shocking.  Here we were in one of the most broken down areas of town hearing beautiful praise songs. We started to relax and were drawn to the music. The sounds of praise that resounded over our heads brought a smile to our faces and comfort to our hearts. He was there.  He is there. He is everywhere.




I don’t have answers….and don’t plan to give any.  I just want to say.  Whether we admit it or not, walls are needed in our lives and what we let in and out of our gates
has a great impact on our lives and on the lives of others. 

Thanks for being a listening ear.

Tammy





Friday 19 September 2014

To love mercy…

I had a really good day yesterday.




  I started settling into my new TeachBeyond office in Kandern.  It was so good to connect with real people again instead of the “virtual meetings” on Skype which I had had most of last year while I was in Canada.  

I connected with some colleagues who are helping with our Congo school project #fateb-teachbeyondkinshasa. We spoke about how we could encourage our team in the DRC, and what communication is needed to make people aware of the school start up there and how they could get involved. We also talked about my upcoming trip and the interviewing of new teachers and training of our new school board.  

Our new school board in Kinshasa, Congo that I am working with


Painting project


After that I went home and worked at renovating some old furniture…basically giving it a face lift by repainting it.  Some of it will go into my new office. Those of you who know me well know that I am a very “happy camper” when I can multitask: lots of different things going on at once. Phil also came home with a very nice “new” car because we had to get rid of our old one before we left Germany last year.




Then last night I listened to the news:  the Ebola epidemic in West Africa, a boat full of refugees sinking and hundreds of people dieing, fighting in the Ukraine, ISIS and the horrors we hear about…. I felt overwhelmed by all the pain, hopelessness, ugliness and sadness in the world around me. 

So how am I to merge these worlds? I live in the “first world” - full of plenty, good relationships, peace…  Do I ignore what’s out there?  Do I shut it off because I can’t handle hearing about the pain, and feel like I can’t make a difference anyways.

 Volunteer with Open Schools #openschoolsworldwide, teaching this young lady to read

For most of my day I felt like I was in control, and that perhaps in small ways I could make a difference in the world.  But the day ended with me feeling like ”What can a small difference do anyway?” No answers….

I woke up this morning with a song in my head. It is a verse my parents used to sing with us when we were kids:

Children who will soon be learning to read with Open Schools
“You have shown me, oh man, what is good and what the Lord requires of me:
But to do justice
And to love mercy
And to walk humbly with our God…”
(Micah 6:8)


Wow, there is the answer.